Dear Uncle (Original Poem)


To begin with,
I woke up thinking
man, this has got to be my lucky day,
even though I was in prison
for my birthday.

And sure enough,
my parole went through.

It’s got a stipulation on it, though:
can’t drink no alcohol,
so I’ll have to stop drinking altogether
because they can make me take
a piss test (I am pretty sure, anyway).

I think I’m going to stop drinking anyways
because all it does
is get me into trouble.

Going to see if I can get some government aid
in becoming an underwater welder,
a highly paid skill
that has always been my dream.

Man, I can’t wait to get out
and start going fishing
and swimming and things.

I plan on stopping smoking;
my asthma can’t take it.

And, besides, I ain’t getting any younger.

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